I wrote a poem.

I wrote a poem the other day at work. It was pretty slow and I felt the need to express myself. After few hours of squeezing the poem juice out of my head, I realized something about myself.


I realized that I suck at writing poems.
My vocab is like Coors Light on tap,
adequate, but no taste.

I rhyme like a 4-year old.
Everything they say comes out cute,
everything I say comes out fobby.

I put s's where there shouldn't be.
It's because I missed grammer school in elementary,
or maybe I just want more of everything.

Most poems like this have 4 lines.
This one comes in threes,
like missing the toy with your happy meal.

Other people speak of things that stirrs our deepest emotions,
or words that tangles with our inner most desire.
I think of poop very often.

Oh woe is thy who cannot type.
For writing does not come with spell-check,
and numbers alone don't suffice.

In terms of the point of this rumbling,
besides the agony of your mind suffering.
I realized that I suck at writing poems.

may 19, 2008

A few months ago I had a conversation w/ my grandma over the phone, she's a sweet traditional Asian lady who lives in the countryside of Taiwan, down South, where taxis are hard to find and trains are few in between. We don't get to talk to each other often because of the language barrier, and when we do talk, it's always short greetings. However, this particular conversation was different.

After the usual 'hello's' and 'how are you's', she surprised me by asking "who you like for president?" To which I reply: "Obama." thinking that she probably doesn’t even know what I’m talking about, but to my surprise, she understood. Not only did she understand who I was talking about, she knows who he is, the values that he carries with him, and what he stands for, which is more than what I can say about most of my friends.

And this got me to thinking, if this 3,500 miles away non-English speaking Taiwanese woman in her 80's cares enough about this primary race that she would take the time out to mention it to her grandson, whom, she only talks to 3 times a years. Then, perhaps we, as in you and me, should be more concern about what is going on before our eyes.

History took place on this day, May 18th of 2008, as 72,000 people gathered together down at the waterfront for the biggest rally this state, or this primary has ever seen. The lines stretched from blocks to blocks, turning downtown Portland into a Disney theme park, just as you thought that you are getting close to the entrance, the line turns down the block again and loops around another corner.

I arrived downtown at 11:45, thinking I had plenty of time to find my place in the rally since the doors don’t open till 12:30, and he’s not schedule to speak until 2:30. And as I drove past the gate I noticed the sidewalks were filled with people just standing outside the Marriott, and curious to find out if there’s a special conference at the hotel. I ended up parking up by PSU because there no parking spot anywhere close by the waterfront, but I didn't mind 'cause it was a nice walk on a sunny day.

However, as I get closer to the waterfront, I found out that the line that circles around the Marriott was actually no other than the line to get in the rally. And as soon as people realize that, everyone started following the line backwards in a panic frenzy to be the first in the back of the line. Crowds of eager fans storms through the line, only to be stopped (sometimes) by the ironically red light that otherwise keeps the Armies of Blue from taking over the city. As we walk, the line seems to be growing faster than the pace we’re walking, increasing the distance with each family, youth, elder, dog, street vendor, ordinary person like you and me. Finally, when I reached the end of the line, I was 5 blocks past where I parked my car. The line wasn’t there when I left. And it was still 2.25 hours before Obama steps on the stage.

For those who came late, or ‘not early enough’, their fortunate didn’t not turn out as good as mine. 12,000 people were left outside of the rally because they couldn’t get through the line in time to get in the rally, which leaves us with 60,000 people who did. And from where I stood, I was probably number 59,358, because I just got in no more than minutes before he began his speech. And for those who never been in a 60,000 long line before, it’s about a 2.5 hour wait, and it stretches 25 blocks, so bring your walking shoe.

And was it worth the wait? I believe that every single person who was there would tell you that it was. Even if I ended up having to listen to him while standing in line 3 blocks away, I would still tell you that it was well worth it. Not just because it was a fun historical event that I’ll remember 20, 30 years from now, not just because I got to be part of the pinnacle of what is yet to come, but because on this day, I stood up for what I believed and let my voice be heard.

We are just one voice, but with one voice it can start up a family, and one family can build up a team; one team can fight for a good cause, and one cause can stir up a rally, and 72,000 voices at the rally can fire up the city, one city can light up the state, one state can move the nation, and together, we can be one nation that change the world. This is where it all begins. It’s time to be educated, start caring, and get involved.

The Nomad

There's a man at work who to others have a name, but to me, he's known as 'The Nomad.' I'm sure he has a real name like the rest of us, in fact, he shared it with me once, but unfortunately, names are not my strong suit.

He is a man who once retired, but decided to come back for reasons not known to me, doing work that's unknown to many of us, and can be summed up by a Micheal Jackson line: "Got to be good looking 'cause he's so hard to see." But that's not the reason why I call him 'The Nomad' I call him that because he is... a nomad.

As if without warning, he just walked in and decided to start working one day, the manager did not have anything for him, not a office, nor a cubical, nor even a space. So he ended up in a cubical next to mine because the person that was there is out on a 2 week vacation. And you know what he did in those two weeks? He just sat there.

On our lucky days, he will grace us with his presence from 9-3pm. And since he's using someone else's desk, he doesn't have computer access, which kills the internet, work docs, excel, printing, typing, processing, and printing. Which then leaves us with... reading. He doesn't even have full phone privilege because while he can call out, it's hard to tell if the incoming call were for him, and when he leave messages it would always end with something like this: "the number is here 713.. 4.. umm... I'm using someone else's phone for the time being so it's probably more convenient if I call you.. but if you need to reach me and get back to me you can call my cell phone at '1800 i'm-useless!'" How ghetto is that? And just when you think it cannot get any worst... it does.

What's a man to do when there's nothing to do, or can do? The man pretends. They found this box from the dungeon down below with some old maps and notes and whatnots, and apparently, it was his stuff from the pre-retirement era. It looks dusty, and it is dusty. And the man spend 2 weeks sitting there, going through this box. Mind you, it's not a big box. A kid can pick it up with one hand, and a horse can fill it all the way to the brim with one pee session. It's just not a big box!

What does he do with the rest of his time? He disappears... every now and then you would see him walking around, always like he's going somewhere important, but then it was turns out to be the bathroom, or the kitchen, or to chat with this person, or that person. And it just goes on and on all day, till around 3pm, then we wouldn't see him anymore... a dusty box is all that's left behind.

To make things worst, Madonna, the rightful owner of the cubical, returns from her vacation a week ago, and thus kicking our bum off his shelter bridge. I never find out where they ended up placing him, and I'm not quite sure they ever did. In fact, I think they just kinda forgot about him, 'cause they never did have anyone set up a computer for him, nor a phone to my knowledge. And every now and then, between the hours of 9-3pm, I see him walking around, going to places, never in a hurry, never carrying anything... just walking around like a nomad, looking for his shelter... or perhaps things to put in his dusty box.

Que Sera, Sera. (Whatever will be, will be.)

When I was just a little girl
I ask my Mother what will I be.
Will I be pretty?
Will I be rich?
Here's what she said to me:

Que sera, sera
Whatever will be, will be
The future's not ours to see
Que sera, sera

When I was just a child in school
I ask my Teacher what should I try
Should I paint pictures?
Should I sing songs?
This was her wise reply:

Que sera, sera
Whatever will be, will be
The future's not ours to see
Que sera, sera

When I grew up and fell in love
I ask my sweetheart what lies ahead
Will there be rainbows?
Day after day?
Here's what my sweetheart said:

Que sera, sera
Whatever will be, will be
The future's not ours to see
Que sera, sera

To those, like me, who are uncertain about the present and anxious for the future.
May you find peace and wisdom, fear and grace, trust and patience.
Whatever will be, will be.

*btw, i like the Pink Martini version of the song. try it, try it now!

April Showers

It’s been awhile…

Awhile as in four months since my last update and a lot has happen since then, as I’m sure with you as well. So here’s the quick run down of yours truly in his golden age.

Currently at: Work! Yes, for those who don’t know already, I have a new job. It’s pretty sweet, low stress, low supervision, decent pay/benefits, and great working environment. A good way to describe the mentality here at work can by summed up by my mentor’s motto, deeply engraved in the trophy his received for his time in the Air Force, “We didn’t get much done today. But we’ll give them hell tomorrow!” I live by that motto on a daily basis.

Currently reading: The Diary of a Young Girl (aka Anne Frank). Yes, I’m reading Anne Frank, and before that I was reading Sex.God. – coddles to Connie for recommending it. Why am I reading Anne Frank? Well, unlike most ppl (ie. Everyone else in the world), I didn’t get the chance to read the book in middle school, or elementary school, because I was busy with my *special assignments. And after reading many authors quote the diary as one of the books that inspired them, I figured, “Hmm… perhaps I should be enlighten as well.” And I have to say, the book does not disappoint.

On a related note, recently I bought a book on grammar. It’s titled The only Grammar Book You’ll Ever Need. I’m only on page 2, as you can probably tell by the lack of improvement so far. But fear not my friends, for I dream of the day when this grammar madness will be put behind us once and for all! No more head scratching or nose cringing, but instead imagine the day that you can read this blog with a normal face, how wonderful would that be? (And to think some people take that for granted… ignorance I say, ignorance!)

Currently busy with: I’m addicted to collecting Pepsi/Coke bottle caps. Not for some weird collection, but for the code…the code! It’s my new hobby. I’m consumed by it. Going to the recycle bin and fishing for bottle caps is my new number one guilty pleasure. It’s a rush because you don’t want to be seen by your co-workers digging through the trash, but yet you want to stupid code so bad so you can rack up enough points after 3 months of hunting to buy a stupid gadget that costs $9.99 and will break down in 3 weeks after you paid for the shipping cost. But yet, it’s so addicting! I check the bin at least 3 times a day…

Give me your CODES!!!

Currently Happening: Unless you’ve been living in a pineapple under the sea, you’d know about our little crazy primary election that is going on between my hero Obama and the lesser of two candidates Hillary. While my thoughts on this election is by far too much to be put in this post, one thing I will say is that the Oregon primary is coming up on May 20th. And this might be the only time in history that Oregon will decide the outcome of the election! Have months and months of campaigning, the fate of the US might come down to the people of Oregon, how crazy is that? So remember to register, April 29th is the last day. Register so you can vote. Not just for the primary, but also for the mayor of Portland and others as well. Gotta give it to Sho, he wants change and he’s making a shot for it.

That’s all for now… over and out.

*special as in FOB work like ESL.

It's something unpredictable, but in the end it's Right.

This is not one of those cheesy "remembering 2007!" posts... instead, that post will be saved for a later, more desperate, day. And as for today, the topic is c.h.a.n.g.e.

Change for the Good'O US of A!

Don't know how many of you fellas have been following the Presidential Race, if you watched the New Hampshire Debate, then good for you! If you haven't been following, then Get On It! Don't get me wrong, by no means am I interested in politics, but there are somethings that are just too important that even Davy Jones himself will set foot on land for. And if that's not enough to convince you kids to tune-in, I also heard that not voting makes you have ugly kids. Yes, it's totally true.

According to the latest New Hampshire poll, Obama and McCain are leading the pack as the leaders for their respected party, with Clinton and Edward 2nd and 3rd for the democrats and Romney and Huckabee for the Republican's respectively. Why is this important you say? Because as history have shown, the poll result for New Hampshire and the final outcome of the race are pretty much carbon copies of each other. It's like playing Halo 3 as Master Chief or the Arbiter, it's the same game silly.

This mean, if history decides to repeat itself, as many times before, we are looking at choosing between either a half-black democrat, or a really old republican for President come November. Now, the question is... Is that a good thing? or a bad thing? That, my friend. I'll leave up to you.

On a related note, I finally find out what Ron Paul looks like. After hearing his name and seeing it everywhere up and down I-5, I finally met the guy... On Leno. At first, I wasn't too impressed with this gov. from Texas, kinda resembles a guy that I know in the white house, except older... like McCain old. He tried to crack a few jokes to lighten the crowd but instead he just looked silly. I was like "umm... you're running for president? " He reminded me of my social study teacher in high school, old, light hearted, and kinda loose in the head. But when he started talking politics, espcially foreign politics, he was like a different person. Passionate, honest, smart, and well-spoken. In the end, the best thing i like about the guy is that he's got a very solid foundation on what the Constitution stands for and the means to get back to its roots. I like him.

Change for yours truly.

First thing first. Even though I had a lot of fun the last couple years with my buddies, and opened my eyes to a diff. world than the one that i know. Despite the "no solider left behind" policy and my self proclaimed wild mustang ways. And the many new friends that I gained... There comes a day when one grows up and say: "enough is enough. even sin is fun in season, and that season has come and passed."

Well, that day... is not today. BUT, I do have to cut back this year. I checked out facebook for the first time in a long time today and caught up on some of the pics up there. Lovely pics i must say, good work friends, keep it up! anyways, then i came to mine, which i must say looked like a constant birthday party. If a stranger were to write my tombstone after given only the pictures on facebook, he'd write: "here lies David, the legend who lived like a wild mustang and then drank himself to death." and there be a sign post right next to it that says: "photo graph - $10 per person / $6 tombstone only" Seriously, I'm 2 steps away from preferring beer over my beloved coke-cola, and on pace to become the next Jack Sparrow by election day (Nov2-8). Shiver me whiskys!

Change for me friends!

Relax today. Go for a walk, run a bath, order soup & salad for dinner. And take some time out to measure yourself. Compare to no one else. just you, not even God. Pray, don't hide, and show your cards. Be emo, sad, perhaps cry. Get up, put a smile on, find a pen, or a crayon. And dream. Be yourself, write, draw, rhyme! And focus, from yourself, to yourself, and for yourself. Start with now, go back to the past, then jump to the future! Keep going, and going, and going... until you've reach your destination. Look around, imagine, see, feel, touch. smell, (deep breath), smile =) Remember, don't forget, take a picture. Keep the picture, come back to the present, post it high up, and plan. ... and change.

The best thing about blogging is not creating a story that influence others out of just letters and words, but is having a brand new sheet to do it over again. I heard Colorado is pretty this time of the year.




p.s. For those who don't know. I have sweetheart now and her name is Boram. you can call her Ram-Bo, but just know that every time you do that, i get pinched in sensitive areas.

David's November Update (DNU)

So... It's December. The month of rum balls, carol singers, red and white fuzzies, and family/friends gatherings. Also for us Oregon people, the month of rain and cold. Just cold enough to keep one indoor and not enough for a white Christmas. November had its brief visit and is again on its annual leave of absence. And what time is better than now for David's November Update! (DNU for short)

This little light of mine, i'm gonna let it shine.

First of all, as I'm sure most of you are wondering, and dying to know, whether or not I have a job yet. Is David finally getting off his bum ass and making a contribution to the society, or is he still sucking his parents retirement fund dry, to the moist level of a burnt pizza crust? Well, the answer is neither. I have a part time job at this joint down the block (10min walk, had to walk to work on the first day 'cause i forgot my car keys inside the locked house. yes, i was late.), but I really wouldn't call it a contribution to the society because... it really isn't. If anything I'd call it a humbling experience. A two level drop from my 'your-highness' status. But fear not, 'tis only temporary, i'm still on the way to change the world, just taking the scenic route that's all.

And at the same time, I'm not quite sucking my parents dry because I really don't spend that much money. I know, I know, comes as a surprise, but the wild party and the credit card swiping days are over. Well, at least for now it is... (I kinda have to 'cause i don't have any form of identification... license got suspended, passport's lost, and didn't want to spend money on a new ID.) I think it's quite free and refreshing actually. Don't know why I still carry around my wallet, perhaps it's time to let that go too?

This little light of mine, i'm gonna let it shine.

Secondly, i'm still searching for that perfect job. One that'll wake me up in the morning and keep me going through out the day. And until I find that job, i'm boycotting Nike, Intel, Vierck & Rakoski CPA's, and the much beloved Target. well, maybe not target, i love them too much. But for the rest of them, Ha! Don't be expecting Nike basketball shoes from me for Christmas.

One of my friend once mentioned that life is pretty much scripted for most of us. You get born, eat, grow, sleep, poop. Next thing you're know you're passing secret notes in class, then comes first kiss, prom, (or prom then first kiss... it's okay.) and then college. Until then, you're life is on a train track. All you know is school, and after school there's more school. Occasionally you pause to make a buck or two during summer, then you're right back to studying and playing Halo. That is all we know and all that we've been told to do. And as long as you have good grades in school, you can be the world's biggest pompous ass and other mom's will still use you as the standard in comparing their kids. "Why can't you be more like David? He's so smart and he's ass is so pompous. juicy..."

But, unless you're a doctor, nobody ever told you what to do after college. Except maybe, "Why don't you study more so you can be a doctor?" To our elder generation, money is everything. It's the key to happiness, to prosperity, and a secured future. And why wouldn't they think that way? All their friends that are happy are the ones with money, not having to stress with balancing the check next month, or finding ways to pay off your kid's tuition bill. So to them, a good job equals a good life. And the best job out there right now just happens to be a doctor... of something.

But for the rest of us, we know... that not everyone is meant to be a doctor. And that money does not bring happiness, nor prosperity, and the last thing i want is a secured future. This is a post to you post graduates. Life after college, what do you do? Contrary to want most people think, I believe you have to be a bit selfish at this time. In the end, only you and God understands yourself the most. I believe deep down inside you know what you can do and what you're made out of. But to bring that inner desire out, we most find ways to tame our secular influences. Maybe you gotta stop listening to your parents, or quit your six-figure job, the one that owns your soul for 90hrs of the week. Or maybe you just gotta move away and start all over again. Whatever you do, don't spend your life waiting, now is as good of a time to start.

This little light of mine, i'm gonna let it shine.

Lastly, and on a similar note, I am currently studying for my GMAT. it kinda sucks. haven't studied anything in a while, so it's kinda hard to get back into it. But i have to... 'cause the test is in 10 days. why so soon? i don't know... i might have been a bit too optimistic on the day that i picked the date. Either way, December 12 is going to be a great day. It just happens to be the same day that i'll get my license back, which is great 'cause i'll need it to take my test. And afterwards we'll all go out and have a grand celebration. yay good times.

John Mark Comer (pastor for The Way, which is a really really awesome place that i think that you should go on Friday nights.) once said, "how you live speaks louder than what you believe." Whether you are religious or not we can all agree that there is darkness in the world. And if there is darkness, there must be light as well. And I believe that we are the light of the world. Each of us will have to make decisions that will either contribute to the darkness or to the light. To hide and be secure, or be noble and take the challenge. It's your choice. You are the light of the world.

Let it shine, let it shine, let it shine.

Broken Beautifully (part 2 of 2)

...I want you to desire the best gifts. So I will show you a much better way.

What if I could speak all languages of humans and of angels?
If I did not love other, I would be nothing more
than a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal.
What if I could prophesy and understand all secrets
and all knowledge?
And what if I had faith that moved mountains?
I would be nothing, unless I love others.
What if I gave away all that i owned
and let myself be burned alive?
I would gain nothing, unless I loved others.

Love is kind and patient,
never jealous, boastful,proud, or rude.
Love isn't selfish or quick tempered.
It doesn't keep a record of wrongs that others do.
Love rejoices in the truth, but not in evil.
Love is always supportive,
loyal, hopeful, and trusting.
Love never fails!

Everyone who prophesies will stop,
and unknown languages will no longer be spoken.
All that we know will be forgotten.
We don't know everything,
and our prophecies are not complete.
But what is perfect will someday appear,
and what isn't perfect will then disappear.

When we were children,
we thought and reasoned as children do.
But when we grew up,
we quite our childish ways.

Now all we can see of God
is like a cloudy picture in a mirror.
Later we will see him face to face.
We don't know everything,
but then we will,
Just as God completely understands us.

For now there are faith, hope, and love.
But of these three,
the greatest is love.


- 1 Corinthians 12-13
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"9 out of 10 questions/problems/conflicts in the world can be solved by simply loving others. The other one by loving God."