It is what it is.

The Black Pearl

When you're a kid everyone tells you to dream big, everyone tells you that you can be anything that you wanted to be no matter how big your dream is. And now that you're no longer a kid, people line up waiting to tell you how your dream is just... a dream. And the sooner that you get over the fact, the sooner you'll move on with life.

Rented the Astronaut Farmer today, been meaning to see it for awhile now and now i finally found the time to put down the partying and spent some time at home on a Thursday night. Lately i've been going out way too much... for my parents good.

Don't know how many of you actually saw the movie, but i've been wanting to see it since it came out in the theater. I remember telling one of my friends about it and to his response "are you serious?" after that I was mum about my hidden love for this film. But for those few brave souls that actually saw the movie, i'm sure you'd agree w/ me that it was GOOD. yea? GOOD! and good it was. There is nothing like a farmer building a spaceship in his barn and launching it into deep space 9. despite all the risks and difficulties, when things keep on getting worst and worst, he kept his dream intact, not just his dream, but the dreams of all those around him. He carried on those dreams and flew high into the sky, where dreams lies.

Of course it was just a movie, and movie can't be real! can they? we all want to be jack sparrow and be the captain of our own Black Pearl. but then society sets in, and we realize that movies are just... movies. and we, are no pirate. heck, we're not even rebellious. we're just lawabiding citizens. Who, day in and day out, continues with our routine to a financially stable, worry free, comfort plus, and successful.. death. yippy-kah-yay~

How many of you when you're a kid dream to one day fly away up up in the sky with nothing but air balloons? And you calculate how much weight a balloon can carry and times it by your weight only to realize that you don't have to money to buy that many balloons. Thus shattering your little dream... Until, you are an adult. Who has a job, and makes enough money to buy as much balloon as a clown and blow. Do you get excited then? Now that you are finally in the position to and have the resources to reach your dream, do you? Do we? how many of us can say that we are on our path to our dream? even yet, how many of us still know what are dream is? when did we lose it along the way?

Kent Couch is a gas station owner who lives in the middle of nowhere in Oregon. (somewhere east by Bend) And he is my movie star. He might not look like johnny depp or the astronaut farmer, but they all have something in common. They are men with a dream. And there's nothing they let stand between him and his dream.

To live is easy. But to live outside of norm? ah, there's the rub. When I was a kid I dreamed of small silly things. While they were silly, to me they are my stars in the sky, and there's a cloud of fog separate the stars and me. Now that i'm older, the cloud only seem to be getting bigger.

I don't want a 9 to 5 job,
but i know i'll get one for stability.
I don't want to work for someone else,
but i know i'll have to till my time comes.
I don't want to spent my life making money,
but i know it's essential for my family.
and most of all, I don't want to give up my dream at age 24.
It's too soon, far too soon.
But i know i'll have to,
just until i realize what my dream is.
And as for now,
it is what it is.

Lately...

I Bought a T-Shirt from Fossils. It cost me 28 big bones, making it the most expensive T-Shirt i have ever bought in my life. much more than the $15 dollar T-shirt that i got in Taiwan with big "DAVID" spread right across my chest. This new shirt is different... it does not sport my name anywhere on the shirt, the color is a funky aqua-teal, and it has these high class waves, kinda like ruffles, sew throughout the shirt. Any rational person would look at it and scoff at the price. "*scoff! $28 dollars for this??" Regardless, I bought it. the reason...? it has THREE wild mustangs spread across the chest. 'nuff said.

I Drove to Molalla the other day. For those of you who don't know where that is, it's between Oregon City and Woodburn. Just keep driving south on Hwy 211 till you reached TheMiddleOfNowhere. Then you're there. The thing about being out in the Boonies is that there's a lot of land, and land = cow, farm, or horses. So as i was driving back from Molalla, going 50 mph, I saw this girl on a horseback. And she waves at me... Not a weird uncomfortable waves, but a welcoming traditional wave. I guess when you're living out there in the boonies you'd do more for human contact. Like waving to a car while on a horse back, even if he's going past you at 50 mph.

I Woke up this morning with a voice message on my phone. It was my mom informing that we had just been robbed. Someone broke into the house that we're currently remodeling and stole some of our goods. I was then told to go to the crime scene and contact the police. I called the police. And they never came... sad. Luckily for us, since it was an empty house, not much was lost. We counted 5 items that was commandeered from us, sprayer, drill, new ceiling light, some misc tools, and most of all, my radio. I wasn't too sad about the fact that my $599 sprayer was hijacked, a little pissed, but not sad. What really got me was the fact that they jacked the radio that i found at Goodwill! The radio cost me $35 big bones! which is like $800 if converted into Goodwill dollars! It was one of a kind, a collectible piece that was made in the 30's... or maybe the 40's. 50's?? either way, it was my musical relief whenever i'm working on the house, and now, it's gone... gone going... gone. sad.

Mustangs... Roaming free in the wild green pasture.

Conversation of David's future.
Me: "maybe i'll go to Taiwan and become a model."
Boram: "WHAT? why? who's going to want to look at you? Blind people?"
My dream of becoming an international model was shattered before it even begin.

Letter to 25.

Know your dream, set your goal, and quit being a fool.